Healthy Balanced Marriages

With every relationship there needs to be a healthy balance. Husbands and wives should discuss what they feel their balance is or their "happy place". For some couples, balance is spending more time together than apart. For other couples, it is spending more time apart than together. Every couple is different and that is why both of the examples above are balanced, healthy relationships. 

Marriages will only be unbalanced and unhappy if a couple spends the majority of their time apart or if the majority of their time is spent together. Another example of an unbalanced marriage is when one spouse wants more time and the other wants less. In the case of the couple who spends all their time apart, how do you think you could spend more time together? Marriage is a relationship. If a couple doesn't spend some time together, the relationship will weaken, just like a muscle who isn't getting a regular workout.  If the couple spends all of their time together, there is the danger of becoming jealous and becoming so intertwined that you lose yourself and your identity. If you are the couple wanting different things, try to compromise. You and your spouse may have really different personalities and interests. Instead of compromising by taking turns of doing what the other person likes, try finding things that you two can learn to enjoy together. 

Here are some questions to ask yourself:

 Do you feel your relationship is balanced? 

Does your spouse? 

 If you think about this past month how did you spend your time?  

How did your spouse spend her time? 

 Were you more together or more apart? 

When you were apart did you feel that your spouse supported you? 

 What about when your wife did something apart from you? 

Did you support her?

Are there some things that you would have changed or done differently?

Have you and your spouse talked about those things?

When things become unbalanced in your relationship, take time to evaluate how you have been spending your time. Has your spouse been neglected? Do you support each other in the activities you are doing? What can you do to get balanced again? 

Life Happens! Sometimes we get knocked off balance in our marriages. The most important thing you as a couple is to know your balance so you can get back on track!